One of my favorite characters in TV series (Suits), Harvey Specter, ever said:
"Ever loved someone so much, you would do anything for them? Yeah, well, make that someone yourself and do whatever the hell you want."
When I was browsing for inspiring TedTalks, I also stumbled upon video whose title: "The Only One You Need to Spend Your Life with Forever" I thought it was about soulmate, or lover, or anything like that. But turns out, the speaker said that after some years of soul-searching, the only one she needs to spend her life with, is herself.
And so, she married herself. She made commitments, for poor and rich. For better for worse. For sick and healthy. No matter how thick the mud is, she is going to be there, for herself. When I first thought about this kind of idea, I can’t help but think that it is such a selfish and self-centered act to always prioritize ourselves amid others.
It wasn’t until I lay in my bed one night and I think of the abundant hours I spent to satisfy my client, that it hits me: I wasn’t treating myself good enough.
I work as a PR consultant, and so I’m dealing with reputation management, communication strategies, and whole lots of good image maintenance for the clients. Everything that they want me to do, no matter how lazy I feel, I’m most certainly gonna do it.
I work to handle clients for a minimum of 9 hours a day. And even after that, I still communicate with them out of office hours. I still finish my task on weekends. I still do this and that just to avoid piling up work on weekdays.
But here’s the question: If I can work THAT hard for a company that isn’t even mine to begin with, why can’t I work hard for the dreams that I want to pursue? Why can’t I spend similar dedication and passion that I pour on my work? Why can’t I treat myself as a client, too??
While my client has Key Performance Indicator, I have bucket list and dreams I wanna pursue. While my client has Work-In-Progress, I have language courses to attend, in order to always improve myself. While my client wants me to organize the document, I also have to sort out my documents if I want to apply for Master Degree soon.
While my client gets me to draft media invitation, I should also work on my blog to keep it posted every once in awhile.
The thing is: I always get everything done for my clients, but never for myself. Too many excuses. Not enough time, too tired, too much sleeping and TV series.
I guess I let all of my energies sucked out to fill in client’s wishes and forget to take care of my own needs.
Or forget about client. Let’s talk about loving someone and be willing to do everything for them, but not for ourselves. We’re willing to stay up late just to accompany them, but we’re not willing to stay up late to study and read some good books. We’re willing to cook them breakfast, but for ourselves, we only eat unhealthy snack bars and chocolates. We’re willing to save up a lot just to buy our partner an expensive watch, but we are so cheap with ourselves. We never treat ourselves, never saving up, always wasting the money for a temporary lust.What happens? How could we treat everyone else better than we treat us?
I am my longest investment. I can lose my clients tomorrow. Partners come and go, as we already knew. But me? If I can’t fulfill my own dreams, I have to live with myself for the rest of this miserable life.
So yeah. Now I totally understand why we have to prioritize ourselves. If we don’t, then who’s going to? Those dreams won’t come true before we work it out. Those achievements are not gonna come automatically, they are results of hard work, consistency, and dedication. And if we don’t start treating ourselves better, we might lose our chances.
One day we wake up and realize that we have been making other people’s dreams come true,
but never ours.
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