20 Aug Weekly Soliloquy #4 – First Impression is Wrong
Posted at 17:51h 0 Comments
You know how they always say, "First impression matters" and "You cannot have another first impression"? And exactly because of that, people are trying so hard (almost, too hard) to become the best version of themselves, up to the point where they can’t be real. They wear their best clothes, smiling ear to ear, trying to be anything but themselves.
But today I want to straight up tell you that first impression is almost always: wrong.
I’m sure all of us ever meet somebody for the first time and right away, we automatically feel like we won’t click with this person. Like, something’s off, we can’t be friends, they’re too stiff, and so on so on.
But if I can speak from my personal experiences, our first impression is not always right. I had this one guy, who is a nerd, geeky, and oh when I first met him I just wish to God that we will never be friends. He talks too much, we have nothing in common, and I just don’t know what to say around him. And so I stay away as far as possible.
It wasn’t until later when I got in a project with him that I got to know his other sides. Oh, turns out he’s smart and diligent. And all of my impression about him faded.
I also met two girls, who – when I first shook my hands with them – I immediately know that these two persons are the last ones I’m interested to befriend with. They just look grumpy, bossy, and ignorant. And yet, when I finally got the chance to work on projects with them, they turn out to be so helpful, funny, and caring.
And it got me thinking, "Hey, how many times I miss being friend with someone just because our first impressions do not click?" And also, "How many times a person refuse to get to know me better just because some goddamn first impression?"
Maybe I was having a bad day, or not in the mood to meet new people. Maybe I was being sick, so meeting people are not exactly fun. Maybe I was having personal problems and my mind is full with other things.
But the thing is: people always take first impression for granted. As if in those split minutes, they can fully understand the man standing before them.
So, I guess we have to be less judgmental, in a way as to not too quick to judge someone and whether or not we’re gonna like them based on first impression. If we don’t give someone second chance, if we don’t get to know them, we will never see any other side that they have.
They could be our future best friend. Our future soulmate. Or our future colleague.
But isn’t it too unfortunate to deny the opportunity of having new friends, just because some silly myth about first impression?
Looking forward, I always keep an open mind. No matter how good or how bad someone’s first impression is, always give them another chances. Second, third, or fourth. Get to know them before deciding whether we want to relate with them or not. Not everyone is an extrovert, not everyone can be themselves around new people.
First impression is almost always, wrong. There is no such thing as first impression. It’s always an awkward start. But the second, third, and fourth impressions? You will get pattern of traits, and that’s when you should decide.
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