We never know when the last time is the last time
I didn’t know when I left Indonesia that I would never be able to see my father in law again, or my beloved aunt
I couldn’t forget the last time I went to Bali with my whole family — dad was as fit as ever, and we had a blast. Mom making rice box for all of us, us playing in the beach, sliding in waterboom, swiming in our little villa.
I didn’t know that would be the last time we’d ever go to Bali together.
I always thought there will be some more.
It’s 26th of May, 2024, now.
Almost 1.5 years after I returned to New Zealand to finally continue my study.
A lot has happened since then, but I couldn’t help but feeling bittersweet about my soon departure from this beautiful country.
There will be the last time of working at H&T Kitchen, cleaning the glass, washing dishes, and turning off the light at the end of the day.
There will be the last time of us doing our groceries. No more Pak n Save, no more wandering around the isle, buying random stuffs.
There will be the last time of setting up my laptop to the TV, watching ‘The Good Doctor’ or Succession episodes before we eventually doze off.
There will be the last time of me walking to the campus, seeing the Skytower on my leftside, standing firm with the sky blue background or hazy cloudy gray on a bad day.
There will be the last time of taking the blue AT bus with Maori/English announcement, giggling when we miss our stop.
There will be the last time of looking outside the window of our apartment, seeing the bustling Symonds & Whittaker Street, with huge trees shedding its leaves in autumn
There will be the last time of random ice cream dates, or farmer’s market, or impromptu mini trips to Devonport.
There will be the last time of visiting cozy homey libraries in Auckland, just getting lost amid the books, working on my assignment, shuffling through the cookbooks.
There will be the last time of baking at our apartment. With the black scales and pink sillicone mat, and blue oven mitt. The place where everything started, where I began a new hobby, and marked a lifelong journey of baking more good things.
There will be the last time of trying new restaurants and cafes, rambling about life and sipping our favorite milk teas.
I will forever miss them. A memory I’d always cherish, 1.5 year with the love of my life, starting our new adventure as a husband and wife.
Before the time comes, I’ll sit here quietly, watching the moment goes by.
Slowly…
